April, 2007

Apr 07

Heard in the pub

I walked into a pub toilet at the weekend to overhear some guy doing a pee saying this to another punter:

Do you get a lot of people from Papua New Guinea here?

[pretending to be from PNG]: We eat each other, but we’re generally small.

I’m cool with that man – I’m not from Edinburgh, I’m not from Glasgow. I’m from Crieff; small town, big people.

Then he walked out.

Apr 07

SC changes

We’ve finally migrated the ScottishClimbs forums. We had been running PhpBB2.x for five and a half years and been getting increasingly frustrated with it for the last three! We’ve moved to Simple Machines and so far (somewhere around a whopping 48 hours) we’re really impressed. Unfortunately, permalinks to the old forums have been broken by this change. Ah well, I have at least tried to keep old links working for SC over the years (sometimes more enthusiatically than others).

We have also migrated all of the written content to the wiki, which is better for everyone. Au revior SC2, you have served us very well. The NRDB and media sections haven’t changed at the moment.

Since my work were nice and gave me a free afternoon off I’ve just spent a very pleasurable few hours browsing around some of the articles on the wiki and posts on the forums. I doubt our enthusiasm will ever be as strong as it once was, but this afternoon has reminded me of one thing: ScottishClimbs is pretty damn cool and definitely worth everything we’ve invested in it.

For me, the most consistently funny posts are from Pure Ned Brilliant. Here are some particularly choice parts for me:


Don’t do it. Keep your work and your re creation separate.

Al is absolutely right. After much deliberation, I started a job shagging supermodels at a thousand quid a day, and it put me right off gloriously abandoned heterosexual lovemaking. So much so, that apparently I am now one of Al’s increasingly recurring homosexual fantasies.


Imagine if you have been working a route for two years, and are just about to go for the lead when a passing orang utan cruises up it and then tries to shag the camera man.


I struggle to see how you can find ‘utter bollocks’ in that statement.

A huge huge congratulations to pete Johnston
for he has been moved from squad to team status on the
Junior British Climbing team

Awesome job pete well done mate
keep up the good work

David, I think you’re right, it may well be impossible. The best I can do is ‘utter bollok’.

I’ll have a consonant please, Norrie.